The Impact Factory Song

Received a mood lifting email written by one of my distinguished colleagues from Britain which I couldn’t resist publishing here for my readers. The colleague is Peter Tyrer. I call upon ZDoggMD to write some music to it, preferably hip hop.

I thought that, despite our best intentions, we are all in the Impact
Factory together and perhaps we need to have a British Journal of Psychiatry
song we could sing to our potential contributors, which I know includes all
of us, so here it is:

The Impact Factory Song

There comes a time of year
Which for some yields joy and cheer
Whereas for others it brings gloom
And impending signs of doom
I refer to the end of June
It’s the Impact Factor tune
Which we dance to tho’ we fear
Its strains may cost us dear
In promoting our alliance
‘Tween scholarship and science
And sometimes in defiance
We reject our weak reliance
On the star by which we steer
With each number crunching tear

But we have to play the game
As our authors will turn to blame
If we fail them in our quest
To be better than all the rest
Now’s the time to attest
In the BJP you must invest
And fan our impact factor flame
By seeing papers you can claim
Really are the best
And once published and assessed
All will be impressed
‘cross East, North, South and West
Let the world then bold proclaim
Each author’s new found fame